Kaminey.

Kya kare zindagi isko hum jo mile,

Iski jaan kha gaye, raat din ke gile

Raat din gile…

Meri aarzoo kamini,

Mere khwaab bhi kaminey,

Ek dil se dosti thi, yeh huzoor bhi kaminey,

Kya kare zindagi isko hum jo mile,

Iski jaan kha gaye, raat din ke gile…

Kabhi zindagi se maanga, pinjre mein chaand la do,

Kabhi laalten deke, kaha aasmaa pe taango

Jeene ke sab kareene the hamesha se kaminey,

Kaminey kaminey kaminey kaminey,

Meri daastaan kamini, mere raasten kaminey,

Ek dil se dosti thi, yeh huzoor bhi kaminey…

Jiska bhi chehra cheela, andar se aur nikla,

Masoom sa kabootar naacha to more nikla,

Kabhi hum kaminey nikle, kabhi doosre kaminey,

Kaminey kaminey kaminey kaminey,

Meri dosti kamini, mere yaar bhi kaminey,

Ek dil se dosti thi, yeh huzoor bhi kaminey…

Hello World

Have a lot to say.

For starters, three characters – F, G, and 4, never gained so much significance in life. Put them together in that order and we get FG4. The single most important spectacle since graduation. What FG4 is, will interest few. So I will skip that part. Just needed to keep everyone abreast of my airtime consumption. Let’s just say this FG4 has walked all over quite a few of my movie plans, dinner plans, and just peaceful breathing plans. I hope it ends up being one hell of a job.

On another note, the other day I consumed my true love. Ate it all up. It resides in the menu of Theobroma Bandra, by the name of ‘Pesto Rosso’ and is by far the best pesto sandwich I have ever had. It’s simple – with the right amount of basil, sundried tomatoes, the freshest lettuce, some beauty of a red pesto sauce, and a gallop of cheese. With fries and mustard by its side, it was like yummy love.

In a perfect world, I would be watching DDLJ and eating this sandwich for the rest of my life.

However, I instead managed to eat with the rest of my family in the drawing room tonight. They were watching one of the fucked up family dramas on the TV. I shall save the name in the interest of the company that helped provide me with my aforementioned meal. The conversation started with how I never spend time with anyone, and just sit locked up in my room in front of my laptop. However, for the better or for the worse, the show started. I will tell you the content without the slightest ounce of exaggeration. There may be judgement in my words, but then, wtf. It started with the shot of one woman telling the other about how she should chill now because she has a daughter-in-law to do the housework. And in my head played Sunday afternoon – Agarwal Household. My taiji telling me to urgently learn my way around the kitchen, because I will be married soon and that’s what life will throw at me. A fucked up kitchen and a million hungry stomachs! Not to forget a mother-in-law fantasising retirement.

Cut to scene 2 – the husband was basically trying to get laid, but the wife wouldn’t understand. So he started with a general – let’s spend time together, followed by how much they loved each other, followed by how they don’t get time to really be ‘close’, followed by how he wants to prove his love for her, followed by how he wants her to feel that they are actually ‘one’, etc. etc. Get the drift. All this, in the typical hindi corny fucked up way, sitting in the drawing room with my parents and elders, was a little discomforting for me! I couldn’t laugh, or walk away, or watch, or anything. Two flowers meeting seemed like an ingenious concept right about then. And talk about my company producing this kind of entertainment, day in and day out. How do I even ask my people to stop wasting their time on this. Am I not worse than they are :(

In other news, I realised I like red apples more than green apples and I like green grapes more than black grapes. I also won the lamest quiz in the history of quizzes posted by a self-obsessed crack human being Buddy Boo.

Also, Ghetto will be Wanchu by the end of this month. Kunjorani will thrive on Bombay dosas for the next 4 months. And also, my life will be spelt as h-a-v-o-c very very soon.

Cheers to fg4.

Point.

Every stanza is for some person different, some time new...

(You gave me life

and controlled it all

my mind worked

on your instant call)

(I broke the walls

I dropped my guard

you stormed inside

and made me fall)

(You break my heart

you make my day

you fix a heart

I gave up on)

(I learn, I smile

I laugh, I bawl

Being me

against the stonewall)

In love with life

yet scared by it all

It either be

or forever gone...

No Shit !

Just last week I travelled to Jabalpur by train, and was more than amused to find this beautiful piece of art in the Urinal. I say ‘art’, because if we were to use logic, this board served no more purpose than that.

It was an AC Coach, yes, it was 2 Tier even. But it still does not mean that the guys cleaning the loos will be able to decipher a word of what the Railway authorities intended for them to read. Yah right!

I will repeat my point here if the picture above wasn’t enough  – Cleaning Instructions were put up on a board inside the loo written in English and only English.

When I started reading the board, I thought it is meant for the users. Except it wasn’t. Not a word of it was for me! All of it was for the kind souls who clean the loos for us, except they don’t understand the cryptic rules they are supposed to abide by, while at it.

It’s unbelievable how senseless some people on positions are. They do things for the sake of doing it. It’s like – ‘We are so cool if we use English, we will use it everywhere to display our progressive approach!’

I tried to inform the TC about this, however, he asked me to go to bed. Let’s hope someone soon realises the redundancy of it all.

P.S. – Sorry for the poor image quality. That was the best my phone camera could manage in the fancy surrounding.

P.P.S – Carry your own pillow the next time train travel approaches. What they give nowadays is this little piece of cotton stuffed in a tiny white bag. Guaranteed back-ache. 

Upswing or Downswing ?

Yes or no

In or out

Love or hate

Up or down

Truth or lie

Live or die

Hold or behold

Mind or soul

Don’t let choices fool you. They are all the same. Pick what makes you happy.

Resolutions 2.0

This file is titled 2.0 because I want to miss the step of fucking up my initial Utopian plan and jump straight to the achievable one. The idea to share these silly things here is that in some twisted way I would feel more accountability towards accomplishing them. Or some of them.

I don’t know if resolutions are supposed to be of a fixed kind. I have never consciously thought about making one. However, the first day of the new decade gave me some hints. Hints that were staring at me in my face. Hints that said, I could easily improve a lot many aspects of my life. Very simply so.

Here I go:

1.       I will sit up straight at all times, so that in future, my backbone doesn’t try to make love to my knees.

2.       I will have a massive VETO over my tear glands. They will not be allowed to trip on their own.

3.       I will learn to be kind to my Mommy. Even if she nags me all day long. I nagged her for 9 whole months!

4.       I will restrain from fighting with Auto guys.  Will resort to direct slaps.

5.       I will not believe what I want to believe. I will say hello to Mr. Reality more often.

6.       I will love beer a little less, and love my belly a little more.

7.       I will stop cleaning random spaces. Or random peoples’ spaces.

8.       I will hide my credit and debit card in the most unapproachable drawer for 364 days of the year.

9.       I will not mock everything Madu.

10.   I will learn the Stock Market and its workings.

All the above points come with a prefix of try. However, I will genuinely seriously try.

Thanks everyone for all your mean words and your irritated looks. It helped ruin my 2010, and will hopefully help make my 2011.

A la prochaine 

Lived Well. Live Again!

If 2010 was a year to take note of shocking outcries, 2011 looks like one hell of a bitch.

Now bitches could do you good sometimes. My bitch of a day (today) seemed to carry a lot many promises. A lot many hopes. A lot many woahs...

Without delving into the whys and hows, let get straight to the 2010 personal WOAHS...!

1.    Graduated as a Mican who ATTENDED classes like her batchmates !!

2.    Pulled of my stunt of the year during Graduation

3.    Shared love and friendship with our highness, Rani Sahiba. Finally, after 4 years !

4.    Had the blonde moment of the century with the idiotic mail !

5.    Loved the first 4 months at Balaji ! (definitely WOAH)

6.    Survived the next 4 !!

7.    Managed to have offices on the same street as Mots’. Yet again.

8.    Started driving normally J

9.    Arrrrun got married

10. Daddy dearest knows my deepest darkest secret

11. The above took place without any form of intoxication present

12. Big man meets my man. Phew.

13. Opened FB every single day for the past 4 months due to work

14. MICA Alumni came. And went :O

15. Partied, Fought, Broke up, Hugged. REPEAT.

16. Partied with the best Losers in town for a warm 2011 welcome. 

However, the entire year and its doings can be stated in the words I wrote here earlier.

To. For. Of. (2010)

Un-high drinking. Sleeping, yet not. Bending backwards. Never coming forward. Shamelessness. Sadly mental. Gladly physical. Smiling. Rediscovering the same old friends. Christmas-y Cleaning. Making strange sounds. Ordering the eyes to stay put. To stay dry. Smooth drives. Scary Signals. Doing the expected. All over again. Dancing, without music. Taking a knock. Unstructuring. Pasting Winners. Dreaming a Pasta. Delivering one. 'Getting down'. So fucking down. Uncareful. Being a bitch. Feeling like one. Cheating. Unconditional loving. 
Hoping against hopes. Creating a blog. Being kinetic. 
Living a little. Same as yesterday. 

..........Happy Happy New Year..........